Secrets of CafeMojo Kitchen & Liquor Cabinet REVEALED!

Lakeside, VA

Richmond Times-Dispatch

12/03/99

In a late afternoon raid, authorities arrested Cap’n Ron, proprietor of the

CafeMojo, a notorious local jookjoint & BBQ parlor for alleged possession of chocolate covered Absinthe popsicles and what police believe to be BBQ sauce laced with Yibogain root, an exotic hallucinogen that not much is known about.

Cap’n Ron was reported to scream "You'll never take me sober you flatfoot

Johnny Longarms!" as he was handcuffed and taken away.

After being released a short time later on his own recognicence, CafeMojo attorney Philo X. Hempstead, Esq. released a statement claiming his client was completely innocent and that he expected all charges to be dropped.

Cap’n Ron could not be reached for further comment and is believed to currently be in seclusion at his Chickahominy Outpost compound.  No other information was available at press time.

Is The Root Doctor In?

MadAlice writes:

Dear Cap’n Ron,

Is Yibogain root really an exotic hallucinogen?  And if so, where can I find it?

Dear MadAlice,

Ahhh! yet another saucy lass looking for Cap’n ron's root of pleasure ;-)

( ...I'm blushing...(!)  )

I could tell ya, ...but then I might wind up owing you alimony! <g ;-)

Cap’n Ron

certified root doctor and man of leisure.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

...the stuff I got'll blow your brains out...